With a little over 24 hours to go before delivery, my heart is racing with excitement and anticipation. It seems like just yesterday that I was researching the world of surrogacy for answers on how it might help me realize my dream of becoming a father and starting a family. It is now 18 months later, and I still can't believe that the greatest event of my life is just hours away. I'm so happy and feeling incredibly blessed.
I arrived in Panama on Friday night after a long and very turbulent trip from Seattle. Fortunately, I had interesting conversation with the person sitting next to me on both flights which helped pass the time. On the flight from Houston to Panama City, I sat next to a very nice woman from Colorado (we'll call her Linda). Linda and her husband (both in their early 70s) were traveling to Panama for an eco-excursion along the Panama Canal (he was sitting in coach, and she was upgraded to first class so I didn't meet him, but he sounded like a nice chap). Anyway, they are avid travelers and outdoor enthusiasts, so she had lots of interesting stories to share about their life together (like their recent trip across the North Atlantic on a freighter that sailed from Amsterdam to Duluth, MN). Seriously, this couple were up for anything!
In addition to our travel logs, we exchanged other stories about this great journey called life. I shared my experience of becoming a Dad, and surprisingly, she didn't flinch. Not that she should, but for someone of her generation, she was very current and refreshingly liberal, but there's more to this story, which is why I chose to share it.
Back in Colorado, Linda comes from a large family of brothers and sisters, many of whom have children, so there are countless nieces and nephews (sounds familiar). Anyway, she shared two stories. The first story was about her 48 year old niece, we'll call her Heather. Heather is a lesbian and has an adopted daughter from Thailand who is now 8 years old (adopted at 6 months). Both Heather and her daughter are great, but struggle in their relationship with Heather's 99 year old mother. When Heather came out at the age of 25, her mother never accepted her and asked her how she could make such a poor decision to be gay. Heather tried to explain that being gay wasn't a decision or a choice she made, it was simply how she was born. Her Mom didn't buy it and for 20+ years she has failed to accept Heather, which has driven a deep wedge in their relationship. And unfortunately, Heather's daughter has never had the opportunity to meet the only grandparent in her life. This made me sad.
Then there is Linda's 23 year old nephew, we'll call him Donald. Since he was a teenager, Donald had been bullied back in small town, Colorado. Shunned by his peers and labeled an outcast by his community for being different, Donald resorted to drugs to escape the brutal reality of being gay. After an unsuccessful stint in rehab, Donald took his own life 6 weeks ago. This made me even more sad.
Suffice to say, Linda has seen firsthand why acceptance in life is so important. I guess that is why my story simply didn't faze her one bit. When we disembarked in Panama, Linda tipped her hat and wished me well. And then I thought...
If there is one lesson in life that I intend to instill in my little girl, it is acceptance. She will learn to accept everyone around her, regardless of the color of their skin, the religion they practise, or their sexuality. And she will grow up in a home where it is okay just to be yourself, for that is good enough. I will teach her to dream big and live life to the fullest, chasing her heart's greatest desires. Tomorrow her journey begins and I couldn't be more proud.
Thanks to everyone who has stood by me on this journey. Your love and support continues to inspire me.
~Rob
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